Car-nage!

Cars play a big part in my life as a Dad. I’m a bit of a car fan and was devastated when Clarkson threw that punch..allegedly. The demise of Clarkson, Hammond and May. Fortunately to be reborn on Amazon Prime.

Before kids you tend to have some relatively exciting cars - good and bad exciting. It would generally improve as you progress through a job and get a little more cash to buy something better, or as DINKY’s you have more disposable income to splash some cash every now and then. I had a terrible car at first...but managed to get a company car, and was fortunate enough for this to gradually be upscaled over time: from Corsa to Astra to a sporty A3.

Then it happens, after kids, things take a big change. Try getting a buggy, changing bag, extra clothes, first aid kit, stroller, some toys, extra-extra clothes, a bag with bits in (not too sure what any of that stuff does but you take it anyway) into an A3 boot - it just doesn’t happen.

I used to play Jack Straws, Buckeroo and Kerplunk as a small child, this is a similar experience - one false move and it all comes crashing down!!! Plus, don’t forget the challenge of the baby and car seat in the back of a three door. With the size of car parking spaces these days, you may just need to use the sun roof to exit your little one from the Britax.

Britax....how complicated are these carry systems these days - 3 in 1, 5 in 1 - wow, maybe a topic for a different day.

So, off you go to get a different car. Not flashy, not sporty, not exciting to drive - no - just because it has a big boot and space inside for all your parenting stuff.

This is when the people carrier became a hit. Way more seats than anyone could really need but so much space, life became easier. Well, maybe apart from the parking which in some way shares a similarity with games like Tetris or Road Blocks.

Our machine of choice - the Honda CRV - massive!! Interestingly back then, many people did go for these fairly new ‘soft-roaders’. Pretty much every manufacturer had started to release them back in the late 1990’s and early 2000’s. They’ve certainly had an extra makeover for today’s market and now known as trendy SUVs.

Instead of that scene from Carry On Camping when Sid James piles the luggage high on the roof with it shooting off only five yards down the road; it became more like Dr Who’s Tardis. So spacious I just took extra stuff because I could.

To all those young parents, it does get better. The time will come when the kids have grown up and you get to go back to more exciting cars, even great cars - better than before. However, a little bit of you has changed, almost disappointing. The fun of squeezing everything in and enjoying the time when the kids are very young. That smile, that burp from the behind, that sing song or game of eye spy. Instead it becomes a Facetime or YouTube fest on the iThingy!

One last bit of advice to help you stay alert to something nasty. If you have a ‘puke-er’, remember to clean the seat belt. Once recoiled and left for a few days, you never get rid of that smell!!!